Gone
by DragosDawn
Summary: When Lyra comes to Bolvangar, Roger is already gone. When she climbs up the mountain, Lord Asriel is already gone. But at least she finds Roger again, even if he is already gone.
1. GONE

Bolvangar is in chaos when Lyra is finally brought there. A child just disappeared. It doesn't take her long to find out that his name was Roger. And she knows that she has just missed Roger Parslow. Not by long, but he is already gone. But that's alright. If he ran, she holds a hope that he will be safe, although it would be great to see him again. But he is surely safe and somewhere along the way it became about more than just Roger. There are kids here who will have to live through unimaginable if she doesn't get them all out of here. For Roger, she thinks, who was brave enough to escape. The only thing that complicates the situation is fear freezing her veins as she sees her mother again.

Ruta Skadi knows exactly where Roger Parslow is and that he is not safe. She was the one who personally got him out of Bolvangar and it was not an act of kindness. She picked the kid because he was bland and she thought it would take them longer to find out he was missing. She doubted anybody would care if he died for the greater good. Surely everyone has already forgotten about this boy. There was nothing special about him. She was wrong.

Iofur Raknison is infuriated when Lyra finally gets to talk to him. There was apparently some problem with Lord Asriel. She just hopes he wouldn't be gone too by the time she gets to him, just like Roger. She is still calm though. Gyptians promised that they will look for Roger. He couldn't go that far. And her father was more than capable enough to take care of himself. Her current problem is this sorry excuse of a panserbjørn king. She already thought about a way to save Iorek, who was blindly rushing here and helped him take his throne back at the same time. He is much more deserving. She doesn't have time to think about other things now. It requires a great deal of effort and focus to lie to panserbjørn after all. Even one as disillusioned as this one.

Lord Asriel is impatient. It is finally time. Bears seem to be aware that something is happening. But they are hesitant to approach him directly. He thinks that maybe they would call Magisterium or Coulter but it doesn't matter now. Soon he would have a kid. All the preparations are complete. Nobody can stop him now. They have become insignificant. He is going to make any barrier they will try to put up meaningless. Their reign is over. He doesn't even have to bother about crushing them now.

Lyra isn't even surprised this time. Of course she would find only a distressed Thorold. Of course her father has already gone. She feels like she is one step behind the whole time. She nearly cries out of frustration, but then she remembers who she is. Lyra Silvertongue, daughter of Lord Asriel and she is not going to cry. So she just wipes the wetness from the corner of her eyes and calls Iorek. They follow fresh tracks of the sledge up the mountain. She thinks that this time, maybe she could arrive on time. Although somehow she knows that it is just wishful thinking.

The boy keeps babbling about Lyra. What an irony. Of all the kids in the world, Ruta brings this little boy, apparently Lyra's good friend. It's annoying, really. Now it's not the time to think about his daughter and get sentimental. In the end, he can't help himself and takes out the picture of Lyra Master gave him the last time he was in Jordan, only hours after he tried to poison him. He looks at it as the boy's body lays unmoving on snow and sky is torn apart, wind of another world on his skin. He wishes he could see her just one last time before he leaves. If she only was older and less childish maybe he could take her with him, show her the world as he sees it. He is sure she would understand. Whatever gaps in her education Jordan college left her with, it gave her way to look at the world and instilled the value of freedom. But she is just a child right now and he doesn't have enough time. He contemplates throwing the picture away, not wanting distractions in the new world, but in the end he returns it to his breast pocket. He doesn't bother to look back at the world he left behind as he walks straight to the new one. Everything that matters lays in front of him, not behind. At least that's what he tells himself.

She catches a glimpse of him and then he is gone again. But she is close. She will catch up to him if she moves quickly enough. It's not a second later she stops dead in her tracks. There he is. Her smile is gentle, her eyes filled with hope. She found him. Finally found Roger. She starts to question what she sees only a heartbeat later, though. There is something wrong with him. She can't quite pinpoint what it is though.

"Salcilia," Pan whispers.

And then they know. What they are looking at is a dead body. Roger and Salcilia they knew are already gone. She was late once again. And she swears it will be the last time. She thinks about all the possibilities. She tries to persuade herself that whatever happened to Roger was just an accident and that it has nothing to do with Lord Asriel. But she knows that that's just a blatant lie. She still comforts herself that if he knew Roger was her friend, if she only arrived on time, he wouldn't kill her. But she knows him and subconsciously she knows that that's a lie too.

"What are we going to do now, Pan? We are lost."

"I don't know Lyra. But it seems that we failed in this world. Maybe we can find hope in another."

"I'm surprised you are the one who brought it up, Pan. You know, it seems like something changed. Like our destiny has shifted and nothing will ever be the same."

"Since when do you talk about destiny?"

"I don't know. You're probably right. We are not safe here. She will not stop until she gets me if I stay here and we can't endanger even more people."

They looked at Roger one last time, walking away, into the new world.

The mountain is quiet. Tracks in the snow start slowly disappearing under the fresh snow. The boy, the girl and the man were gone. All in slightly different ways, leaving nothing but quiet. But the silence ias not meant to last long. There are people slowly gathering. Some out of curiosity, some out of hatred, some out of pure joy. They felt the change. And they all hold just a little hint of fear. Because with all that happend, it seems that a world itself as they knew it, is gone.


	2. GONE BUT REBELLING

It's time to raise a flag and take a stand. He opened the gateway that ripped through the worlds and it attracted attention not just of the Magisterium of his own world. His steps are just as silent as his daemon's, but there is intentionality to them. There's a glint of obsession in his eyes and his mind is one-tracked. There are beings who can feel his intentions across universes. And they will come, from both sides. The first creature to find him is no more than a shimmer in the air, almost transparent, yet it manages to cause unease in Asriel and Stelmaria. He hesitates in his step, but then resolutely steps forward again to deal with whatever it is, only to be stopped by a tall winged being appearing right between him and the shimmering silhouette, making its way to it and making it disappear in a single blow. He almost smiles as he knows that this moment marks significant progress in his ambition. A stepping stone, if you will.

"We have to move. There will be thousands of them soon."

Asriel nods, following winged being, what he would consider an angel, curious about both the angel and the creature it stopped, but knowing that it's not the right time to ask questions. He contemplates if this is a good idea, but he feels at ease and Stelmaria doesn't hesitate so keep following the angel. He always relied on his intuition and even if it sometimes leads him into uncomfortable positions and ultimately cost him all his wealth and a large portion of his status, he liked to think that that was largely caused by the wrongness in the world, not in himself. They walked away from the city, into the fog. Another angels joined them, some of the shimmers, "Specters," said the first angel, but they were quickly dealt with. They came to the opening to another world, a much smaller, square version of gateway Asriel himself created, but no doubt still a portal to another world.

They stepped through into the empty, abandoned world. There is nothing impressive about it, but it is exactly what Asriel needs. A new beginning. A world without oppression, where everyone is free. They turned around and Asriel saw hundreds of angels circling around the mountain, building what looked like foundations for some kind of fortress.

"It's only temporary. We thought you would need some kind of fortress and that you would like this place but we know you have things to say."

"Yes, thank you. I actually have some questions before we start talking about details. First of all, who are you?"

"I'm sorry. I understand it's a custom with humans to introduce yourselves when you meet. My name is Xaphania and I'm the leader of rebel angels. I was the first to discover that the Authority has lied regarding his status as the original Creator so I was banished from the Clouded Mountain. We felt your intentions and we decided we would fight with you in your war."

Asriel nods. Felt his intentions. That was… interesting. "So, if you felt my intentions then…?"

"Yes. The other side has felt it as well. They won't attack in some time, the Creator doesn't consider you a serious threat yet, but they sent Specters after you, who you already met."

"These Spectres. What are they? What do they do?"

"Nobody really knows what they are, but they feed by attacking humans and eating their soul."

Asriel buries his hand into Stelmaria's fur, an unconscious gesture, but immediately noticed by all the angels around him. They don't comment about it, knowing the nature of humans. It isn't the first time they would ally with a human, although it was quite some time since one of them was so determined about their goal. It gives them hope.

"So, what are we waiting for? We need to send a message. You can do that, right?" Asriel asked. Maybe this direct approach wasn't the best strategy, but right now he needed to move quickly.

"We are quite capable of spreading the message, yes."

He almost barked another order but then he felt Stelmaria's head pressing at the side of his leg, not quite growling, but definitely warning him. Right. He needed to calm down and remember who he was talking to. Angels had showed him great respect and it was only courtesy to return it back.

"Thank you. Do you think you could tell me more about what you know about the Authority? I don't think we can decide properly how to move forward without being on the same page about this."

"Of course."

At that moment, Asriel is confident that he just found a powerful ally. They sit down and he is prepared to lose another day discussing and organizing things. Stelmaria would probably remind him to take a break and catch a couple of hours of sleep if they were alone, but he doesn't have time. Besides, they are both too high on adrenaline to be able to sleep. They have been since he received a message from Ruta that she is coming and will bring a boy. So he listens and asks and plans. Finally, he gives orders. It wasn't until much later that he got around to finally rest. He is looking at the new world, at the future Republic of Heaven as he contemplates the future and the past. He sits down for a moment, then he gets up again and starts pacing. Stelmaria remained laying still, but her tail is swishing from side to side, dead giveaway that she is just as restless as he was.

"It's about a child. The boy reminded you of her."

"He kept babbling. Blindly believing that she will come rushing up the mountain saving her. It's hard not to remember that."

"And yet it's not him you keep thinking about."

"No. I just wish for some kind of closure."

"Maybe it's better this way."

"What do you mean?"

"To be reminded why you are doing all this."

"Lyra?"

"Don't play dumb Asriel." Now Stelmaria was pacing while he sat down. "You know it. I know it, so you do too. She is not significant. Not special. Shouldn't matter in the grand scheme of things. We should not take her into account when we make important decisions. But don't lie to yourself. This _greater good _stuff is ridiculous. We don't do this for the greater good. We are selfish. We don't care about people living in a better world without Authority. We want Lyra to live in that better world where she has the freedom to be whatever she wants to be. So even if you don't want to return, after all the fighting is done and Lyra and Pantalaimon are a little more grown-up, you want them here."

"Maybe you're right. Maybe that's why we are rebelling."

"Of course I'm right. That _is _why we are rebelling."


End file.
